There once was a person who needed to show,
That he was the best and the smartest of all,
And even in times when this just wasn't so,
He learned to inflate things, no matter how small.
Thus people would think he did more than his share.
Of course, if he couldn't, he simply would steal,
But give minor credit, to prove he was fair,
And make his contrived contributions seem real.
He'd always agree, whether falsehood or true,
Unless he could profit from shooting you down.
When no one was watching, he'd ask what you knew,
Then make you look small with his betters around.
He did all these things to help get him ahead,
This talentless hack with an envious thirst.
The irony is, one fine day he was dead,
And for all his plotting, he'd gotten there first.
